I'm just not ready

I'm just not ready for you to be 2.

2 years ago I was wondering if you would have any hair and if so, what color it would be.

Today I held your hand as we walked out of Cookie Cutters with a red balloon.

2 years ago I was busily washing bottles and getting pacifiers ready.

Today you said, "milkos peas momma" and held out your Lightening McQueen cup.

2 years ago I remember stock piling newborn diapers.

Today you said," poopy momma" and raced down the hall to the bathroom.

2 years ago I was washing all your tiny clothes in baby detergent.

It's been several months since I ran out of it. And your clothes aren't so tiny anymore.

2 years ago I was packing your diaper bag for the hospital.

Today you wear a mini Diego backpack. The diaper bag is gone.

2 years ago I had no idea how much more love a momma's heart could possibly hold.

And then I held you in my arms.

And my heart burst into a million pieces of happiness and love.

I have never been the same as I was 2 years ago.

And for that I am incredibly grateful.

What an amazing gift God has given...to be able to witness your life and to be called your momma.

And I look forward to observing and shaping the little boy you are growing into...

but it's going to fast.

And I'm just not ready.